about crafty

Most of you probably have interesting stories to share about this long holiday. I have none. And that is especially because my social life is non-existent. Zero. Zilch. Numero nothing. I go to work, home, then work, then home. So everything I know has been courtesy of a rumor. Which is how I heard that K-CI and Jojo was in town. Do you remember them? No? Me neither. I have not heard news about what it is they sung, how they sung it (considering one of them lost his voice) and to whom.

Enough about rumors. Today I want to tell you about this girl I know.

Now, ‘Crafty’ as she will be referred to from here on is not your average case of miss know it all. This one is a serial case of miss know it all. If you have a headache, she has a migraine. If you need tooth filling, she needs a jaw transplant, if you know someone who got his or her toe operated on, she witnessed a bone marrow transplant. Or like if you say you were at the commissioning of the new mosque, she will tell you about her visit to the taj mahal. You get?

I have failed to come up with a topic that crafty does not know anything about yet. I mean geez!! when I am telling about something I saw on TV, she has actually been to those places. Like the other day we were talking about Australia and she said, “When I was on a boda-boda to Australia,…” okay she never said boda-boda but you get it. I mean, who even goes to Australia? So anyway, most of her sentences begin like “in London we used to…” “my worst plane ride was…” “At Wal-Mart I …” “My Italian friends they…”

This one time we are talking about identity cards and she goes like, “Me, my UK passport is like my international I.D. I use it all the time bla bla bla…” I mean damn! Why would anyone want to steer a good old-fashioned conversation about cheap Ugandan identity cards toward international travel documents?

Oh, and did I mention she uses her visa card to shop for things off e-bay, Amazon and www dot something or other?

p.s. I have never been anywhere outside Uganda- this could probably explain the obvious spite in the above post. Or maybe crafty is a bit much? Let me know.

17 loungers burdening me:

crys said...

been here too, n i like it! p.s: she's too much. in this era of globalisation, people dont talk like that anymore.

tres jolie said...

why am i getting a creepy feeling, like I know "crafty"?

Phoebe said...

i like crafty- obviously her horse is way bigger than mine. me thinks she cooler than u!
i actually think u have a silent crush on her... the little miss sunshine.

wicthy said...

do iknow crafty?????????/

wicthy said...

do iknow crafty?????????/

magoola said...

I want to date. And leave her for her best friend who has never been been outside a radius of 100 miles from Kampala.

buttercookie said...

Huh Savage???

Hi Antipop... just passin by.

-Cheri

The 27th Comrade said...

You've never been outside Uganda: celebrate. You've not been tainted. Yet.

DeTamble said...

You've never been outside Uganda?
But getting tainted is so much fun!

Mr.Back2Basics... said...

Hehehehe
i am chuckling too
I know a coupla "crafty(s)" me'self AntiPop!

Maybe you should become Anti-Crafty!

Big Fish, Little Pond!

Be silent said...

He he he he Crafty we have many of those in kla she has been to the Taj Mahal???? I die Tell her about Iceland, Bring up going to the moon and if she says her ride to the sun was bumpy bitch slap the lies out of her.... he he he he he he he

anonymous gal said...

Tres u think u know crafty. i dumped her as a friend. i dont like such pple. my dear its not jeolousy thats doin u o crafty has unresolved issues or sumthin like that. hiss

kissyfur said...

Im in total envy of crafty. Dont think she be bragging I just think well her life is really good.Perhaps she should be more considerate of the less fortunate....hehehehe

candybox said...

I think i was in high school with Crafty.
I swear some people can test the patience of a saint.

31337 said...

I do not have any patience for their ilk, i flee before i have to kill someone.

Lev said...

I have a friend that is just like that!!

No matter what you say or do they have done it and seen it better than you.

He is also in the Navy so some of the stuff I can believe (As far as world travel goes)

But then some of the things are just ridiculous.

It can be very annoying!!! Haha

Mo Ma said...

So...'crafty' is what they call me behind my back, eh?

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