My shine

This morning on my way to work I was standing by the road trying to cross it obviously, because I do not have idle tendencies of just standing by the roadside for just. Anyway, so I am standing by the road looking left, right, then left. There is an elderly lady standing right beside me, also attempting to cross the road. She reaches out and takes my hand. Startled, I turn and look at her and without saying a word, held on to it tighter and helped her across the road. or maybe she helped me. On the other side, I let go of her hand, she smiled,I smiled, and withought ever sasying a word to each other, we had shared a moment. I have never felt so special in my life. It is the little things




Meanwhile, check out, neatsilverbow

pishures

Work's crazy. Sometimes i work 13 hour days. I kiss butt for a living. In the morning, I am a kayungirizi of sorts. In the morning, I will be in the meeting with my bosses where I will listen to and comply with their every whim. And then when they are done whining, I will kiss their royal butts. Later in the day, I will call up the people that are in charge of satisfying the whims of my bosses and I will kiss their ordinary(insert list of all your favorite bloggers) butts. This is a true story by the way.

Also, is it just me or has there been a general slack in morale ampng boggers? wats up guys? keep those posts coming!

Anyway, here are some pictures. Feel free not to look at them.




Detamble fixing her glasses properly in order to make out those dark dark faces that were in front of her. Solomon King looking at her and thinking, dude, i am right in your face, how come you can't see me? anybody know what happened to detamble by the way?


something no man should be caught alive doing. carrying a woman's hadbag does not count as one of the romantic things a guy can do to prove undying love to a woman.







would you trust this proffessional tailor with your clothes?







Not even if the medicine is to save your own life?







And that tree is growing right outside of UMEME offices in nakawa/kyambogo. For those of you who do not geddit, the tree is growing right under the electricity lines. phew!

It contains Vitamins A, B,C,D,E and Z complex



Yep. When those of Warid start making airtime cards, they will stop being singled out.



Then later maybe you can taste the food






Dapht, and Doofus enrolled here



And that is Carlo.

The chilling truth

Most of you probably read this story in Sunday vision. For the benefit of those that cannot access newspapers on weekends maybe because office is closed on Sundays and they cannot get ‘em free, they are too stingy and won’t spend on a newspaper, or their roads are too screwed up by Lord knows what and hence the newspaper trucks cannot get to their neighborhood, here is the short of it. On a July or June day in 2006, a rich man went to his construction site with two burly men and a 7 year old girl in tow, and watched while said men threw her into a pit that had been dug out in the still-under -construction- building and covered her with concrete and later proceeded to do sacrificial chants on her grave. This sort of thing is done in the quest for riches. I have not been able to have any pure thoughts since I read that story.

But just two days before that, I was out in the field with one of my bosses, also, a very popular rich little man in town. Anyway, he was briefing some of his employees (drivers) on safety and shit like that. Then he said something that chilled me to my breast bones. He said “Be sure not to knock down anybody. Because it is very costly in hospital bills. Unless you are lucky and that person dies. There I get to spend less on burial and stuff… ”

There. His concern was not for people’s lives but how much he would have to fork out in compensation. For the rich, it is all about the money. No heart.

I am not very happy today. Can you tell?

originallity 101


The year is 2008. There is a credit crunch and the US has a Kenyan for President. It's a very odd state of events. Very! Back to the credit crunch. Money hasn't started growing on trees and while people wait for that, they need ideas. Brilliant revolutionary ideas. The stuff of legend. Stuff that people will buy.

Some where in the nation of Dapht, off the coast of Angola, a company has been brainstorming. Thus far, its been a futile process. The chairman of the board of directors Kwak Industries wants innovation or everyone will be subjected to reruns of that telenovella they loathe. Its not looking up and all hope is just about lost....when suddenly...




John: Ladies, I have come up with this brilliant and totally original idea. Let us manufacture batteries! you know, the kind that people can use in their remote controls. yes. I bet nobody has ever thought of that! not even the guy that invented remote controls. Am I brilliant or what?

Joseph and Japheth: Cool.

Japheth: But what shall we call the batteries?

John: That is where I come in. I also managed to come up with an original name to go with the batteries. Ladies, allow me to introduce you to Panasonic

Joseph Rushes over to his computer, types panasonic into his google search bar and gets 1,804,573,240 hits. Looks over at the girls disapointment showing on his face and says

Joseph: Thori Ladieth, but it theemth that name isth already taken. But here isth another name I had been meaning to bring to your attention justht in keth we ever invented a cardboard boxth. Are you ready for.....Toshiba!

Japheth who until now has been silently watching wondering what in the world she has been doing hanging around this dumb bunch, shakes her head)

Japheth: Ladies please. I hear what ya'll have been trying to say. But as you all already know, and i have constantly proven to you over the years i am the brilliant one in this group, let me do some brain storming with my medula and get back to you girls in three, two, one... PANASHIBA! And that is final!

Joseph and John dumbfounded by this sort of wizardry yet again, just nod their head in wonder and get down on their knees to worship the day's hero.

have a nice weekend guys

not without my onions

Due to popular demand, I have decided to come back. Okay so I am stretching the public demand bit. Only Cheri wanted me back, but I am here anyway. I have been away because I was dealing with emotional trauma.

Last week Sunday
Lawn mower guy comes home pops his machine to life and before long, grass blades are meeting their demise. Nice enough. We do not have to live in constant danger of being bitten by snakes. Not so nice is that the noise from his outdated lawn mower has just interrupted my Sunday afternoon TV routine. Yes. On Sundays, I watch TV like it is going out of fashion. So I fought with my conscience about shouting at the guy about the possibility of muting his damn thing. Reason won. I figured, he couldn’t possibly know that the machine was making noise. You see, lawn mower guy is deaf. Besides, I have the plight of the physically disabled persons at heart.

Sometime last month
This genius idea came to me. It was so brilliant I sat back and hugged myself right after it had occurred to me. So I thought I would contribute to family welfare by increasing food production. I sorted through the onions at home and came up with perfect candidates for planting. Five of them were quickly lowered into the earth and I sat back and waited for harvest time. Everyday I checked on the onions, pruned, weeded and caressed. They were the best looking onions I had ever seen. They were so hot in fact, I could not wait to see how favorably they would compete with the boiling cooking oil once they had been harvested. In short, I was proud of these onions and even more proud of my handiwork. They were germinating well and I was pleased

Last week Sunday
In the evening, I went for my daily routine of checking on my onion garden. There were none. They had been leveled to the ground! They were the level of the freshly mowed grass. I knew immediately who had done it. I had let him off the hook earlier about the noise because he was deaf, but what excuse did he have now? Clearly his sight was excellent otherwise he would not have gone into the grass cutting business! How could he have not seen those onions? How could he have missed them standing there in their glorious splendor? How could he have mangled my babies so? So anyway, I am sorry, but I am going to have to shout at a handicapped person. So all this time when I have been away, I was composing a hate speech

Update
My onions once proud and glorious now sit in withering cowardice. The once healthy well fed glorious healthy looking leaves have become all skinny as they attempt to grow back. I miss my healthy babies

Fact
Yes I planted onions in a grass compound!

Loser chronicles

From the loser chronicles, I bring you quotable quotes

Loser; so how have you been?
Antipop; ok. Have kind of missed you
Loser; Yea. I know. Despite everything people say I know people always liked me. You see, I always went the extra mile to make people happy
Antipop; I’m sorry, what?
Loser; Yes. I went the extra mile to make YOU happy
Antipop; when? Gi’me one example
Loser; you don’t remember? We even used to do sports together
Antipop; Er, sports?
Loser; Yes. We went drinking together. That is the greatest sport a man can do with a woman. You have got to admit though, that was a nice gesture on my part

Comment;
Yes I remember these times. Holed up in a cheap kafunda wedged between weird looking characters speaking Rutoro. The closest I got to sports was this one time they brought a steaming tray of pork and set it on the table in front of us. And loser told me to dig in. I folded my sleeves and did what any self respecting woman would do. I made a dash for the meat.

i have often wondered

First off, let me just say that we all have different ways of looking at things. For example, boy recieves a basket of flowers, you see love, I see a blog post. By the way, that is as close as I am going to get to as if appologising to you who thought I have nugu and all that from before.

But this post is about how i have always wondered...yes. I sit there and start wondering about stuff. Research has shown that all smart people are like that. Also, this is as close as I am going to get to explaining to people how extremely brilliant I am. So this is what I have been wondering;

What type are you? Are you the type that wipes, squishes the tissue, dumps it in the toilet and pulls up your pants/panties and forgets about it? Or are you the looking type? As in, you wipe and you check...If you are the latter, don't you just hate how sometimes you wipe and wipe and wipe and wipe and wipe and wipe and wipe and wipe and wipe and wipe and wipe...phew!

Moral of this thought; Eat your greens and drink a lot of water!

Note to Baz; Do not think i have forgotten about the whole reputation killing tirade you had going about me the other day. Mbu "maternal-looking brown chick eating maize and humming Rock Of Ages to herself." I will have you know I have very excellent taxi ettiquette.



Above is a gift basket a guy at work recieved as a surprise from his girlfriend. In it was all kinds of exotic fruit blank blank blank decorated with all sorts of flowers. Now, the only thing that came to my mind was this;

At what point in their relationship had she finally realised he was gay?

help. i am bored out of my skull

i decided to quit lounging. i realised rather late that it did not put clothes on my back blank blank blank...so i got a job. yea. i know! finally! thank you y'all that bought me food, clothed me and all that.

turns out, lounging is the most fun i have ever done in my life. i come and sit at my desk and do nothing! zilch. just cut out newpaper storues and then stare at my blank computer screen!

blank because(i should mention that i am glad i have the computer. yesterday i was just staring at the woodwork of my desk. fine wood i must add. must be mahogany. or synthetic something. i digress)well, it is blank because i do not have an adapter, so i can not connect it to power yet. i hear they are going to have to first requisition for an adapter, have the bosses approve the purchase and then get somebody to go and pick it! Geeeez! i hate protocal. so anyway, i have no computer, no internet, no life!

that means i miss you guys

and i have had to beg somebody to use theuir computer! do you know how humbling that was? no? well it was!

don't know when i will be back here. ttfn= ta ta for now
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